Monday, April 8, 2002

Renaissance Man

Everyone says they want to be a renaissance man. They want to be up in all elements, but the renaissance isn't about that. It's not being up in all elements. It's about being a master of all elements.

I've just been thinking. That line up above is just a conversation I had with one of my best friends, Brian. It's not word for word exactly cause it's actually been awhile since that conversation but the idea of the conversation is the same. It seems like everytime I talk to him, he always drops some knowledge on me and changes my way of thinking. Messing around with this and that isn't the same as being an expert in this and that.

It's like this quote I once heard. "A man who's stuck 10 miles in the ocean and swims all the way until he's 5 feet from shore is still going to drown." Everyone knows and heard to give it your all but you gots to keep giving it your all until the end. You don't start strong and not finish. You have to follow through or all you've done is wasted your energy and time.

I know I say a lot of things, but I know sometimes I gots to listen to my own advice. Now is just a good of a time to start as any.

Tuesday, April 2, 2002

525,600 Minutes

"Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes, how do you measure, a year in the life?"
- Rent "Seasons of Love"

Well, here is my first journal entry. I still don't know if this journal is going to be more for me to just vent out all my thoughts and feelings or for you reading this? I wish I could write something that will inspire or enlighten you, but we'll just see what happens. You'll probably notice that I jump from subject to subject and that my grammar isn't exactly too great either but just I got so many thoughts I want to express and things to do yet so little to time.

I guess this journal is really about my life. As you can see I took a line from the Musical "Rent." The whole line from the song is "Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes, how do you measure, a year in the life? How about love?" I think that line explains me. I measure my life by the blessings I have. When things get rough, I think about all the people I know who are there for me, and it keeps me going. You know there will always be rainy days in life but who says you gots to go through it alone? You got people who will be there for you to hold an umbrella over your head and to keep you warm in those cold times. I value my friends and family probably more then I value myself. What would I do without my friends?

I sound like an old man huh? I'm only 21 but my mind is grown, hahaha. I been saying that for awhile now. It's from Mobb Deep "Shook Ones Pt. II." The original verse was "I'm only 19 but my mind is grown and when things get for real, my warm heart turns cold." Ever since high school, I wanted to be able to say, "I'm only 19 but my mind is grown." Now I'm 21, I'm 2 years older then my original plan. That verse always stuck in my head. It must suck to live a place that by the age of 19 you're considered grown. A life that means you experianced so many things that most people don't at a young age or most people will never experiance in their life. A lost of innocence is a cold reality to face. At times, I think my life is like that. I'm not going to kid myself and say my life is that crazy, but I've been lucky to understand things without having to learn it the hard way in most situations.

You can tell music plays a part in my life. I one of those people who listen to the lyrics but lately music hasn't been as big a part of my life as it use to be. I haven't been listening to the radio like in high school. I still can't believe I'm a 3rd year now in college. High school seems like yesterday and yet so far away at the same time. I know that's hard to understand for some people and for some people you can feel me on that. I feel like I got no time or energy to do things I would normally do all the time in the past. I'll admit more than before now, I rather just lose myself now in songs with good beats or chorus. I remember back in the days I was so into underground hip hop, and I would be so against "commerical" songs, but it's true, people want to dance sometimes.

I'll continue this later. I gots to get my learn on.